Tag: fear

phearnik!® is No Stella Al Fresco

Published on by awsstudiosart2 Comments

Who is Stella Al Fresco

I made a doll and it is not like Stella Al Fresco.

Sunday morning in the NYTimes, I saw an article about how Megan, The Dutchess of Sussex, promoted a doll on her new show “With Love, Megan.” Commonly known Stella Al Fresco, Megan’s daughter’s doll is sold with “a little baguette and a little cheese.” The dolls’ creators claim the dolls and their accessories help kids mimic adult behavior. Says  Acorn Store owner  Heather Hamilton where the dolls are sold, “Kids really like imitating life, and if this is what they’re seeing on their parents’ patio, then they just pretend play.”

A picture of the doll commonly called Stella Al Fresco. It helps to show the difference between it and the aws Studios.art phearnik! plush and how it is different , has a different purpose and is not like Stella Al Fresco.
The doll commonly known as Stella Al Fresco
A picture of the phearnik! plush, a small rag doll with a lavender body, a navy blue jumpsuit and a wild head of yarn for hair. It has big black eyes and a squiggly mouth. Funny, cute and a little bit scary.
The phearnik! plush

Which makes me think that my little phearnik!® has a long, uphill slog to the market. How does my slightly scary looking doll/plush that is not like Stella Al Fresco compete with the sweet, cute and Cabbage Patch-like doll? And how does my aws Studios.art doll stack up against a doll promoted by Megan?

phearnik!® is no Stella Al Fresco

phearnik!® is 180° from Stella. But that’s okay. phearnik!® is not meant to mimic adult/parent behavior. phearnik!® stands for something else.

A Little Scary Looking

Yes, phearnik!® is not a sweet looking doll like Stella. phearnik!® actually looks a little scary. It’s supposed to look scary. I made phearnik!® to look a little scary because the plush represents a “little fear.”

The idea behind the phearnik!® doll was to make an object that represents fear.  I would take the “little fear” with me to remind me to keep my fears small. When I keep my fears small, they don’t get big and take control of things I want or need to do. More about where I got this idea here (hint: it’s from Elizabeth Gilbert’s book, Big Magic: Creative living beyond fear).

A picture of one of the original versions of the phearnik! plush prototype. A small rag doll with a lavender body, a navy-blue jumpsuit, googlie eyes, a crooked mouth and wild hair kids love.
One of the original versions of the phearnik! plush

Sharing the phearnik!® Idea

Initially, I created phearnik!® to help me with my fear of the blank canvas. Then one day my granddaughter spied the doll on my dresser. She wanted one too. (How couldn’t she? With its quirky face and wild hair, I thought!)

A picture of the cover of the original book about phearnik! titled "Adventures with phearnik!." The book has been revised and is now "Phoebe and phearnik! Fight BIG Fears"
The original picture book about phearnik!. Now revised as “Phoebe and phearnik! Fight Big Fears”

While making my granddaughter a phearnik!®, I came up with the idea to tell her its story in a book. Hence, I created the picture book Adventures with phearnik!® and gave her both the book and plush as a birthday present.

A picture of a little girl holding her phearnik! The plush helps her overcome her fears so she can join in and have fun.
Guess who with her phearnik!

The phearnik!® Campaign

Since then, I wanted to share the book and the plush with others. phearnik!® definitely helped me. Every day it’s there to remind me not to be fearful of things that are new to me like a blank canvas. More importantly, it helps me with becoming an entrepreneur to promote the phearnik!® idea to others. I believe phearnik!® can help others who, like me, are held back by irrational and debilitating fears.

phearnik!® has helped me do everything I have needed to do to get to this point of launching the phearnik!® Campaign. The campaign seeks to raise funds to support mental health making the plush available to others, both kids and adults, dealing with irrational fears.

A picture of a bookmark that says "Support Mental Health, Join the phearnik! Campaign" with a QR code to sign up.

Yes, phearnik!® is no Stella Al Fresco but That’s Okay

A picture of the doll Stella Al Fresco holding a phearnik! plush symbolizing how the plush reminds kids to keep their fears small.
Stella and phearnik! as friends

phearnik!® is not like Stella Al Fresco. But I like to think that even Stella would like to have a phearnik!® It would remind her to keep her fears small so she can live a more fearless life. Ah, yes, what a vision. Instead  of competing with each other, Stella and phearnik!® could be  friends!

Do you agree? What do you think? Have you ever had a doll like Stella? Or phearnik!®? Tell us about it in the Comments.

Find out more about phearnik!® and get a free “How to Use phearnik!®” pdf here.

Support mental health and sign up for the phearnik!® Campaign

Coming soon: the many faces of phearnik!®

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Support Kids’ Mental Health with phearnik!®

Published on by awsstudiosart8 Comments

“My kid is scared of everything”

Parenting fearful kids is exhausting. Furthermore, it’s even more exasperating than just “plain old parenting” which is exhausting enough!  The fears I’m talking about are the non-life-threatening kind and are often about things other children have no issues with.  Importantly, you wonder, why your child is so anxious and scared of everything?

A picture of a little girl in bed in the dark looking very frightened.
From the picture book “Phoebe and phearnik! Fight BIG Fears”

Longing for Curiosity and Courage

Indeed, you would love for your child, lest I say, “To be like other kids.” I’m talking about the ones who don’t seem to be scared of everything. Life would be easier and less stressful. Moreover, it would be great if your fearful child could approach new experiences with curiosity and courage.

Developing Skills

A close up of two kids having fun playing in the surf from an illustration from the picture book.
From the picture book “Phoebe and phearnik! Fight BIG Fears”

Clearly, all kids are different and deal with unfamiliar activities in various ways. This often depends on their skills. We develop physical and mental health over time, frequently without noticing we’re developing skills.  We more easily think about what’s needed for our children’s physical health. The ethereal skills of mental health are harder to pinpoint. In addition, you may ask, what exactly are those skills?

Assessing Skills

To help parents, caregivers, teachers and others assess a child’s mental health, I have put together an introductory skill checklist. The list begins with the basic skills of social and emotional health. Also, the list includes life skills and others for specific emotional needs.

Mental health made simple – A free skills checklist

Importantly, basic mental health begins with communication skills, both interpersonal and intrapersonal. Helping kids to be less ‘scared of everything’ begins with building their  intrapersonal communication skills.

Less Scared of Everything with phearnik!®

Meet phearnik!® –  a toy that helps kids build an essential intrapersonal communication skill!

Who  wouldn’t want a toy that relieves their kid’s fears and be less scared of everything? Well…  phearnik!® is that toy! When faced with non-life-threatening fears, the small quirky plush prompts children to practice mindfulness, an intrapersonal communication skill.

phearnik!® (pronounced: fear-nik) means “Little Fear.” It helps kids to mindfully keep their fears “small” and not let them get “big.” Having a little fear helps keep kids safe. But too much or letting it get “big” stops them from doing what they want or need to do.

“Too little fear and you don’t pay enough attention; too much and you freeze.”

Anthony Doerr, Cloud Cuckoo Land

Support Kids’ Mental Health

This post marks the beginning of my phearnik!® campaign. My goal is to make the cute little plush available to any kid who needs it. I want to bring its subtle powers to  help these kids be less scared of everything.

More about phearnik! here

Over the next few months, I will be talking about phearnik!®:

  • what it is;
  • what it does,
  • how it helps boost mental health and
  • how I am trying to bring it to kids who need it.

Then in October, I plan to launch my 30-day fund-raising campaign to help manufacture, package and ship phearnik!® and its accompanying picture book to kids who need it.

A picture of the phearnik! plush prototype. A small rag doll with a lavender body, a navy-blue jumpsuit, googlie eyes, a crooked mouth and wild hair kids love.
phearnik! prototype

Help Boost Children’s Mental Health –

Join the “phearnik!®” Campaign
  • Get more information about how phearnik!®  works,
    • Find out how the quirky little plush came to be,
      • Get campaign updates (like how phearnik!® will be made available),
          • Get more mental health skill building info and
            • Support the larger mission of boosting children’s mental health skill building!
    Sign up here – Boost Kids Mental Health Skills Today!

    Next blog post – details about how phearnik!® works. Sign up to stay tuned!

    How to Achieve Your Resolution

    Published on by awsstudiosart2 Comments

    A New Way to Achieve Your Resolution

    It’s resolution time once again. This year, I was intrigued by the NY Times article, “For a Happier New Year, Focus on Your Loved Ones.” In it, writer Holly Burns, posits a new way to make and  achieve resolutions.   Instead of self-focused goals, Burns suggests making other-serving resolutions – goals with or about others. She then supports this idea with research. The study shows that when we take the focus off the “self,” we can positively impact both ourselves and others.

    Struggling with Next Steps

    If you’re anything like me, you struggle with achieving your goals. Also like me, with many steps and so much to do,  it feels overwhelming.

    I have been struggling with my next steps with my aws Studios. My plan is to put most of my efforts into launching my therapy doll into the toy and novelty market. My deadline is this year. It’s a lot to do in a short amount of time. My goal objectives include:

    • Setting up a crowdfunding campaign
    • Getting quotes and samples of the toy and its companion book
    • Creating an eBook
    • Getting a doll and book package designed and
    • Promoting my “product” with this blog and social media posts.

    From Self-Focused to Other-Serving

    I’m guessing that, like me, you make self-focused resolutions. These goals center on becoming a better person, have a better body, etc. Often, we don’t get too far with these promises. But I am digging this idea. I like the idea of taking the focus off us. And, making resolutions that impact both ourselves and others.

     Perfect Timing

    Because of my feelings of overwhelm, I have been looking for a “sign” to keep me going. The idea of making resolutions for others comes at a perfect time for me. we are more apt to keep working on our goals knowing it will affect others. It is the sign I have been looking for.

    What Is Your Other-Serving Resolution?

    To help you think of a resolution that benefits someone else, here is mine as an example:

    In 2025, I resolve to launch my phearnik!® crowdfunding campaign. phearnik!®, or “little fear,” is a small rag doll. It helps fearful kids and adults manage their fears. Once, managed, they can  join in and have fun (more about this here and here).

    My Other-Serving Resolution Can Help You Make Yours

    If you are looking to resolve feelings of fear and anxiety or help others with theirs, phearnik!® can help. The quirky plush teaches fearful kids and adults to be more mindful of their reactions to fear. It prompts its user to make the important brain switch from primitive reaction to a contemporary, non-life-threatening response.

    Let’s Achieve our Resolutions Together

    Fear of the blank canvas!

    In the Comments below, share  your resolution (self-focused or other-serving, it doesn’t matter). I’ll support you in your quest to achieve your resolution.

    And if you sign up to this blog, you’ll be supporting me. I’ll be updating my resolution – all about helping fearful kids and adults learn an important mental health skill.

    Happy New Year!

    Click to see how I do with my resolution!

    Managing Fear with Mindfulness is Not Just Sitting and Meditating

    Published on by awsstudiosart1 Comment

    Managing Fear with Mindfullness

    With a Mental Health Skill Building Toy

    I’m trying to get a toy that helps with managing fear with mindfulness licensed. The toy, or plush – a small stuffed doll – helps kids strengthen mindfulness, a social and emotional skill kids and adults need to be healthy.

    This image shows the head and face of the plush toy I am promoting that helps fearful kids and adults better manage their fear and anxiety.
    Face of my mindfulness plush

    Don’t Let Your Fear Get Big

    The doll/plush, designed for kids to take with them where they might experience fear, is a prompt. It reminds its owner that it’s okay to have a little fear – it helps to keep them safe. As well as that the plush reminds kids to not let their fear get big or out of control. Uncontrolled fear holds kids back from doing what they want or need to do.

    This image shows a Barbie doll sitting in a yoga or meditation position. It shows the type of mindfulness toys that are on the market today.
    Meditating Barbie

    Mindfulness vs meditation

    Recently, I asked a colleague in the toy industry to review the “sell sheet” I created. Sell sheets are a one page explanation of a product to potential licensees. After receiving their feedback, I realized, the reviewer did not understand mindfulness. I don’t think they’re alone.

    I believe it’s safe to say that most people think mindfulness is the same as meditation. They envision it as sitting on the floor and and quietly calming the mind. Furthermore, while mindfulness can take place while meditating, it is not the only way one can experience this skill. I like this definition from Berkeley.edu (paraphrased below):

    Mindfulness is the practice of being aware of your thoughts, feelings, and reactions in the present moment. Moreover, it involves being fully present and engaged with what you are doing. It includes intention, cultivating awareness, and attention – a focus on the present moment, sensations, and thoughts and can be practiced during everyday activities.

    Practiced During Everyday Activities

    Henceforth – the “practiced during everyday activities” – the not sitting and meditating is the idea behind my plush. The doll is small and can be carried in a backpack or a pocket and is there to remind a kid (or even an adult) to keep their fear small and not let it take control of what they (the kid/adult) might like to do, take a breath and give the slightly scary task a try.

    This image shows a little girl with the mindfulness skill building plush in her backpack. It shows how the plush can be taken anywhere where a child might experience fear.

    And It Works

    I should know. Indeed, I made the plush initially for myself to remind me to keep my fears in check. These fears included working with the toy industry. In addition, another way to think of it is to keep them “small.” Also, this includes taking a breath, letting it out, and giving whatever I was initially afraid of a try. And here I am. Subsequently, I am networking with people in the toy industry (who would have ever thought!). In addition, I am learning the ropes. I am putting myself out there – raw and vulnerable – my “mindful reminding” plush by my side.

    Hopefully, this post will help explain and define “mindfulness” a little more. I hope it will help explain my mindfulness plush toy and how it works to boost social and emotional learning.

    What About You?

    Do you practice mindfulness and do you even call it that? Do you practice it on the go or by quietly meditating or both? Have ever used anything to remind you to be mindful of something? If so, what did you use?

    More about mindfulness and the brain here and here.

    Another Why “There’s a Mental Health Crisis Among American Children”

    Published on by awsstudiosart2 Comments

    Something’s Missing

    In the NY Times article, “There’s a Mental Health Crisis Among American Children.  Why?: And the pandemic is not the only reason,” I noticed a missing “why”, a big one.

    Tingley lists many reasons why we have a mental health crisis in this country. These include issues with data collection, the ability for more children to receive adequate and early mental health care. She also points out how the pandemic has added to  the crisis. But, she adds “rising numbers” of children and youth with mental illness was happening before Covid19. Less than 15% of these youth received treatment. 

    A Lack of Mental Health Education

    A picture showing to little girls hugging to emphasize the need for more mental health education.

    As a mental health educator, the “why” there’s a mental health crisis in the US that I see missing is the lack of mental health education.  The NYT article and others about the state of mental health in the US usually  emphasize the issue of accessing treatment as the number one reason.  But treatment for mental illnesses is a “downstream” strategy, a way to administer to those who are ill.  They are often emergency life-saving measures.  On the other hand, mental health education is an “upstream” strategy.  Its purpose to arm individuals with the things they need to know and do to maintain mental health and prevent mental illnesses and the need for treatment as much as possible. 

    Making Mental Health Skill Building Fun and Easy

    Because of the lack of mental health education, states like New York and California have made or are making it a law. These laws work to ensure mental health education happens in schools.  It’s too bad we need laws to make mental health education take place.  Teaching and learning the skills of mental health isn’t hard.  And it can be fun!  In my last post, I talked about learning the social and emotional skill of acknowledging fear. Embracing a “little fear” helps us move beyond anxiety to a place of thriving.  For all healthy skills, it helps to understand why we need the skill and why it works.  To learn the skill of acknowledging fear, it helps to understand how our brains work when we’re experiencing it. 

    Fear is a powerful emotion.  In its basic form, it keeps us safe.  And in our early human development, tuning into fear was essential for survival.  The thing is, even now hundreds of thousands of years later, fear still wants to react in its primal way.  A lot of fear we experience isn’t a life-or-death. Because of this,  we need to embody the skill of calming our primal brain areas down and tune into the areas that provide a more modern, logical and practical  approach.

    I like how Dr. Steve Peters explains this in a simplified and fun way. Helping to clarify the complexity of brain science, Peters breaks it down. He conveys how our “emotional thinking machine” “The Chimp” needs to placate “The Human,” the area of thinking and planning. Says Peters, “You are not responsible for the nature of the dog but you are responsible for managing it, keeping it well behaved.”  Just as “you are not responsible for the nature of your Chimp but you are responsible for managing it.” And that’s a mental health skill! 

    So, yes, we may be in a mental health crisis. But we don’t need to wait for laws and our schools to put a dent in that crisis. Mental health education can be provided now.  As parents and adults, we can help build the skills of mental health in our children. And, more importantly, for ourselves – in fun and engaging ways.  That’s what my picture book, “Adventures with phearnik!™”  is all about.  It’s a fun way to learn how to keep your social relationships and emotions healthy! 

    What about you?  Could you use a fun way to help your child not be so fearful or anxious?  Could you yourself use the same!?  “Adventures with phearnik!™” can help! 

    Art, Artists, Anxiety and Overcoming Fear of the Blank Canvas

    Published on by awsstudiosart5 Comments

    New Way to Handle Fear

    Image shows a collage illustration of a man sitting in front of his easel looking unsure of what to paint like he can't start his painting.

    My picture book, “Phobe and phearnik! Fight BIG Fears,” is a story about a way for children (and adults!) to deal with fear and anxiety.  Compared to how fear presents in other children’s books, my book introduces a new and, may I be so bold to say – revolutionary – way to handle fear.

    As an artist, I suffer from what’s called “blank canvas syndrome.”  It’s like “fear of the blank page” that some writers experience or stage fright that actors might encounter. 

    Artists + Fear

    We fearful artists have the expertise to do our jobs. At least we have enough to produce a piece of (art) work. But fear holds us back from tackling  the canvas, page or stage.  While experiencing this, I feared the outcome.  Would my picture come out as I envisioned it?  I feared my work would be judged by others negatively. When the artist accepts the outcome of their work, they more readily dismiss negative judgements. They then see it as a mismatch between the art and viewer.

    Building Confidence

    Having these fears mainly shows a lack of confidence. Confidence comes from artists doing a large amount  of work. With this comes the faith that the outcome won’t be so bad. Granted, not all art outcomes are accepted, even by the confident artist.  Doing scores of work – making lots of paintings – might become garbage. I wonder how many artists out there have a fear of wasting materials like me?!  I am a child of parents who grew up during the depression.  People like us don’t waste things!  We eat everything on our plates!  We use and reuse things repeatedly and rarely buy new!  Cheap artists like me want the work to come out the way we wanted it to the first time. Or else we’re wasting materials!  Yes, sad but true.

    Studying Fear

    For years, I “studied” what I could do about my fear of the blank canvas.  I read books like “Art and Fear”, “Affirmations for Artists” and “The Artist’s Way” and kept them for reference.  But none of these helped me break through my fears until I read Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Big Magic: Creative living beyond fear.” 

    Take Fear with You

    In the book, Gilbert offers a new way for artists to deal with/confront their fears in a now, well-known vignette titled, “The Road Trip.”  In it, Gilbert suggests artists accept and acknowledge their fears instead of trying to ignore it or get over it or, somehow, get rid of it.  She uses the metaphor of taking a road trip as a lesson in acknowledging fear.  On the trip, you bring your fear with you but it must sit in the backseat and it doesn’t get to control anything.  It doesn’t get to drive and it definitely doesn’t get to control the radio!

    An illustration of a seated woman with a very frightened look on her face but you don't see what is frightening her.

    Revolutionary Strategy

    This idea of acknowledging fear but not letting it take control was, for me, revolutionary.  It makes so much sense.  Fear is one of our most powerful emotions.  It’s part of us.  It cannot be willed away.  It’s always there but we can learn to control it.  And, as a mental/social and emotional health educator, I know that’s a skill.  Having an understanding about a health topic and learning the skills is how we are healthy.

    A picture of the "Phoebe and phearnik! Fight BIG Fears" a picture book that helps kids reduce their fear and anxiety.
    Book cover

    Picture Book Explains Strategy

    In “Phobe and phearnik! Fight BIG Fears,” I’ve created a picture book using Gilbert’s idea. I take it one step further. I help kids and adults learn the skill of acknowledging fear. In addition, I want them to not let it take control of the things they want to try or need to do.  It’s worked for me and I bet it can work for you too!

    How about you?  Are you an artist that has experienced fear of the blank canvas or page?  Or maybe even fear of wasting material!?  Or maybe you are someone who would like to of make art but is afraid of what people would say about it ?  I would love to hear about it in the “Leave a Reply/Comment”.   

    And, if you’d like to  be one of the first to get a copy of the “Phobe and phearnik! Fight BIG Fears,” picture book, click on the picture to place your pre-order! After your info, type “Pre-order” in the box!

    A picture of the "Phoebe and phearnik! Fight BIG Fears" a picture book that helps kids reduce their fear and anxiety.